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Tick Picks a few Slick Tricks...
By Staff
Date: 12/8/2003
Tick Picks a few Slick Tricks...

By Tick of Cycling4Fans

The First Ever "Tick Picks a few Slick Tricks" Annual Awards!

Splash of the Year:
Werner Riebenbauer, for his dramatic fall two meters down into a muck-filled ditch during the Giro. As teammate Scott Sunderland describes it, "We couldn't stop laughing -- all we could hear was static and water sloshing around on his radio." Ribi didn't have to worry about riding in a crowd for the rest of the stage...

Bagman of the Year:
Lance Armstong, a child with a plastic bag, Tour de France, 15th stage...need I say more?

The "Oops, I Did It Again" Award:
Cadel Evans, who cleverly managed to break his left collarbone, not once, not twice, but three times in one season.

"The Dog Ate My Homework" Excuse of the Year:
The contest for the lamest excuse is always a tough one -- there are so many worthy contenders -- but the winner this year is "I couldn't transfer the money because the banks were closed for Karneval." --Gunter Dahms, Team Coast.

There's No Business Like Show Business Award:
Lance and Robin Williams, Lance and Sandra Bullock, Lance and Sheryl Crowe, Lance and Lyle Lovett...

Are We Adults or Are We Kindergarten Children Award:
The Vuelta, in all its grown-up wisdom, invited Domina Vacanze to race only if Cipo would start. He started...and even managed to finish the first stage...and then got directly on an airplane and in all his adult wisdom flew home.

Why Did He Bother To Start Award:
Ivan Quaranta of Saeco, who dropped out of the Vuelta after riding a grand total of 3 km.

Most Embarassed Rider:
Telekom's Rolf Aldag, wearing the King of the Mountains jersey in the Tour de France, saying, "I'll ride wearing a rain jacket, even if it's100 degrees -- me in the KOM jersey? That's too embarassing!"

Show Us What You've Got, Big Guy, Award:
Rene Haselbacher of Gerolsteiner, who crashed in the TdF's 3d stage and finished the race with his pants showing more -- a LOT more -- than they covered...Rene picked up a lot of new (female) fans that day....

Hooray, I Won; Oops, No I Didn't Award:
Kim Karchen, who was just sooooo sure that he had outsprinted Sandy Casar in Stage 4 of the Tour de Suisse. Kim, next time wait until you're OVER the finish line to start celebrating!

Ooh, Baby, Baby Award:
CSC's Carlos Sastre, sucking on his baby's pacifier as he won the 13th stage in the Tour de France.

The Godot Award for Waiting:
After reviewing the films hundreds of times and (extremely) hefty discussion as to Who Waited and Who Didn't and Why and Why Not and Who Really Cares Anyway, the surprise winner is: Iban Mayo! When Armstrong crashed, he crashed too, in order to wait. And when Armstrong attacked later in the stage, Mayo waited for Ullrich! What a sportsman!

Also see the Daily Peloton Readers' First Unofficial Best Cyclist Awards - from our message board here.

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